Embarrassing Ramblings.

I'm terrified that I'm walking away from someone that I'm supposed to be with. Something has always felt right with him, even when everything was going so wrong. But things really have gone so wrong. I know I have to walk away for my own sake and sanity. But I'm scared that it's meant to be and I'm too hurt to realize that. That one day he might reach out with the intention of telling me that he wants to be with me and I won't answer. 

If there was nothing there, how come I'm still the one on his mind 5 years later? 

"I bet this time of night you're still up

I bet you're tired from a long hard week

I bet you're sitting in your chair by the window, looking out at the city

and I bet, sometimes you wonder about me.

And I just want to tell you,

It takes everything in me not to call you.

And I wish I could run to you.

And I hope you know that every time I don't,

I almost do. 

I bet you think I either moved on or hate you,

Cause each time you reach out there's no reply.

I bet it never ever occurred to you that I can't say hello to you and risk another goodbye.

And I just want to tell you,

It takes everything in me not to call you.

And I wish I could run to you.

And I hope you know that every time I don't,

I almost do.

We made quite a mess, babe.

It's probably better off this way.

And I confess babe, 

In my dreams you're touching my face and asking me if I wanna try again with you.

And I almost do.

And I just wanna tell you,

It takes everything in me not to call you.

And I wish I could run to you.

And I hope you know that everything I don't,

I almost do.

I bet this time of night you're still up,

I bet you're tired from a long hard week

I bet you're sitting in your chair by the window, looking out at the city

And I hope sometimes you wonder about me."